Almost There

So it is 11:42 pm on Tuesday here in Vegas, which means that it is 1:42 a on Wednesday in Chicago. I must say that I am a little disappointed with Las Vegas. I played the slots today....which I didn't get a thrill from. We walked around the strip for hours and no real excitement. All the casinos really looked the same. All the clubs require that you don't wear tennis shoes or jeans which is great for most people....but I don't dress up. I like to be comfortable and that is that. End of story. And then here it is that at 11:42 in Vegas...that I'm done for the night and ready to turn in. The problem is that that means that as of tomorrow, I will be in LA. And for the first time I don't want to be there. There are a million reasons why, most of which I won't admit too, and really one major reason but I don't want to be there and that scares me more then anything. I want to be back in Chicago, going out with Anna and Nora or clubbing with Kevin or sitting at the Pug with Nick or just being with Ashley. This is such a huge thing for me and I have wanted it for almost four years. It's like now I have to keep telling myself that I want it and that it is for the best but I'm not 100% sure. Why am I dragging my feet? I just gave up basically everything I owned, a good job and people I love because I KNEW it was worth it...